Both from my own observations and from conversations with friends, I believe many conservative Christian families are facing a generational dead end. What I mean is that young people who have grown up "in the faith" are not translating that faith to adulthood. Either they don't know how, they don't see the point of making the effort, or they simply don't realize there's something missing.
There are several reasons I see for this situation. First, there is a set of expectations - a status quo - that exists in some Christian circles quite independent of any spiritual reality. This is dangerous. As long as you do the right things and look a certain way and speak a certain vernacular, you can fit in. The name of the game is conformity and good behavior, and it's not that hard to catch on to the charade and the accompanying lingo. What this means is a lot of chaff in the wheat, a dilution of the Gospel, and a general lukewarmedness.
Second, I think our conservative Christian circles have become altogether too isolated and clique-ish. The practical effect of this is to blur the picture of what constitutes "mere" Christianity. The Gospel is no longer stark and stunning; it begins to have all sorts of things attached to it. Certain trivial externals like wearing dresses or reading the King James or not drinking alcohol or not listening to rock music are integrated into Christianity as de facto doctrines. They don't belong there. Those are subjective personal convictions, and if you preach them as Gospel, you're working against the kingdom in two ways:
1) You're giving nonbelievers the impression that the Gospel is primarily about morality.
2) You're giving nominal Christians the impression that they are saved as long as they abide by "the list."
Both are grave distortions of what Jesus is really about.
So, we have this sub-culture that we thought was a good thing that is turning out to have some rather disturbing repercussions.
What do we do now?
I presume it's an unnecessary disclaimer to say that I don't know the answers. At most I may have some useful thoughts to contribute to the discussion. In the end, this takes all of us.
To begin remedying the first problem, it's imperative that we create in our communities the sort of atmosphere where the real thing can't be faked. What would a community like this look like? I submit it would consist of people who see the difference between trees bearing spiritual fruit and trees that merely look nice. Lots of trees look nice, but there's nothing to eat on them. "Whatever is born of the flesh is flesh, whatever is born of the spirit is spirit." You can't fake that.
To address the second problem, we need a less complicated understanding of the Gospel, a broader experience of Church, and a bigger context for God. We need to see firsthand how God works in other believers of other nations and cultures and backgrounds who are very different from us. We need to rediscover a sense of the Gospel being especially for people who don't have it all together, and to recognize that that includes us. We need to acknowledge that we aren't in any way better or more holy than Christians who have tattoos and watch R-rated movies and read The Message. We're all the same. To those who think themselves superior, Jesus has this to say: "The tax collectors and the prostitutes go into the kingdom of God before you." As this realization of our common plight soaks in, we may just become more like Christ and less like little Pharisees.
For us young people, we have our own uncomfortable confessions to make. We need to repent of a spirit of apathy. We need to acknowledge that we say a lot of things that have no real meaning to us. We need to recognize that we haven't taken responsibility and instead have freeloaded on our parents' spiritual initiative. We need to admit that we really aren't any better than the so-called "worldly Church" or "institutional Church." We're messed up. We need Jesus. And we need to start at the same place as everyone else: completely bankrupt, totally dependent on the cross and the blood and the reality of the empty tomb.
This is a tough transition, and there's no formula or guide book for negotiating it. We need to strip down our rhetoric and start rebuilding a meaningful phraseology on solid and simple foundations. We need to take ownership of our own "pursuit of God" and take seriously our commission of communicating Life to the world, not to some vague group of people who are "the lost", but to our generation, right here, right now. Keith Green said each generation of Christians is responsible for that generation of people. Have we realized this task is ours? What are we doing about it?
Make no mistake: I'm asking these same questions of myself, and many days I don't know exactly where I stand. But I'm learning to rely on Him who is able to make me stand (Romans 14:4) and keep me from falling (Jude 24).
I conclude with this admonition from Galatians, and I pray that we have ears to hear.
For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself. But let each one test his own work, and then his reason to boast will be in himself alone and not in his neighbor. For each will have to bear his own load.-Galatians 6:3-5
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9 comments:
Agreed. I remember how long it took me to realize how messed up and needy I was. (I doubt I realize it fully even yet!)
I believe one aspect of the type of community we need to have involves becoming accountable to one another on a deeper level than we may have before. One teacher with whom I am familiar offers this specific Scripture as a guideline:
Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God. But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called "today," that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. (Hebrews 3:12-13)
Question: How does one recognize an "evil, unbelieving heart"?
Appreciate your thoughts Stephen. As for your question, I don't know. I think the verse you cited is encouraging us to fellowship and exhort one another as a preventative against that sort of heart developing. Once it has developed it's difficult to diagnose and remedy, particularly in yourself. By definition, you don't know when you're deceived.
Aaron - I have seen and feel much pain and concern about these same things in this generation. If we do not find the solution to this problem we face becoming another chapter of the sleeping and dead church. May this never be. I am so glad to see you are facing this openly. I hope to be getting in touch with you to see if we can discuss this further.
Amen, Aaron. There is much more that needs to be explored on this issue, and I sense the Lord is using what you wrote to prod me to pray, meditate, and likely write some things to add to this.
While there are balancing thoughts that are likely needed in the big picture, to avoid over-reacting, what you are addressing desperately needs to to be aired widely among the conservative Christian circles.
I have just sent a link to this to a mom who is fearfully desperate her family is not following the ideals she has harbored for her family. I am convinced the heart of those ideals is of the Lord, but we must not focus on the outward fruit as more than examples. The inward reality of an intimate walk with the Lord is the reality we all must keep central.
Thanks for writing and sharing this.
Jonathan
Amen to all you wrote, Aaron.
I think the biggest issue with the young generation of Christians today is apathy. And it often seems that young people aren't taking their parents/families beliefs as their own. And it's not just the specific beliefs here, it's the truth of Jesus Christ and what He did for us. We have to make it personal! Otherwise, it isn't "ours", and it doesn't mean much.
And we also have to realize that we all need Jesus. We as Christians are no better than the non-Christians down the street. It's just that we've found the answer to our sin and accepted Jesus Christ as our Savior. I think that we (including myself!) too often forget where we came from and where we were before Jesus came into our lives.
And up above, someone mentioned accountability. I think that he/she made a good point there. We need to be accountable to each other, be willing to be humbled and realize we do need help still. We all need sharpening.
Proverbs 27:17 Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.
This is a hot topic and of great concern to parents and other 1st generation believers who regularly make observations about 2nd generation “believers”. We could spend hours and pages discussing this topic. I’ve been chewing it over since you posted it…bugs the daylights out of me.
We forget Christ’s words that Tares will grow AMONG the Wheat. Its one thing to point at the worldly Tares, but quite painful to accept the reality that a Tare may be growing under our very roof. I’m fascinated by how far the Wheat will go to convince themselves that the thing growing next to them is not a Tare or attempt to convince the Tare to behave like a piece of Wheat…remember the Church of the Tares is alive and well AMONG the Wheat and anything goes in the Church of the Tares. You can bank on this though; Wheat always has been and always will be a work of God.
Your admonishing is good…2nd generation “believers” must examine themselves not before man, but God. Believers know if the Spirit of God has born witness to them and with the exception of babes in Christ, unbelievers are unable to make that distinction. The fruit of ones life is either good or bad and any other kind becomes questionable and firewood.
The issue is not the choice of entertainment or clothing or scripture version. Its about the Gospel! Its not the perfection of your life but the direction of your life. For the young who genuinely possess the faith, there will be a constant nagging desire to know Him. They will always battle in their minds about what to do and what not to do. Don’t we all? Those of us that are older in the faith should take care not to force too much spiritual food down their throat. We get so anxious….we plant some seeds, flood it with water, come back tomorrow, and wonder, “why haven’t you sprouted yet”. We’re always seeking something to glory in and nothing would be more satisfying than to see something sprouting that WE planted…hmmm. Growth is a work of the Word and Spirit. I confess, I plant the Word in people’s lives but want to forget all about it afterwards leaving the results in Gods hands. Even confessing this is an act of pride on my part. Gee, maybe just maybe, I should let the Lord do the planting and watering and get out of the way. We humans have a lot of troubles, often wanting to sub for the Spirit of God in the lives of others. It’s a great challenge. People need to taste Jesus and not the vessel He uses. Nothing worse than tasting plastic instead of the water….yuck.
Again, very good post…lets just make sure we don’t spend all our time trying to edify Tares or throwing pearls before swine, when we ought to be strengthening those that hunger and thirst for God. Lets give Gods seed lots of time to grow and always remember that Christ said He came to divide households. We just never expect it to be ours and unfortunately, this can occur right about the time a man is glorying in the “godly work” he has done in the lives of his children. All of a sudden, one of his kids grows up and “slips away”. How painful to see all the work burn up, how devastating to know its out of your control. The Lord in His infinite wisdom will hurt us to stop our boasting, for it is imperative that His children be clothed in humility….humility that is delivered through grace in times of pain.
“Make no mistake: I'm asking these same questions of myself, and many days I don't know exactly where I stand. But I'm learning to rely on Him who is able to make me stand (Romans 14:4) and keep me from falling (Jude 24).”
That my brother is probably the best place a person could ever be. God bless you for addressing this.
Matthew 5:6
Matthew 10:34-39
Mathew 12:33-37
Matthew 13:28-30
John 15:1-8
John 17:15-19
1 Corinthians 3:1-17
1 Corinthians 4:1-5
2 Corinthians 12:1-10
Galatians 6:10
1 John 2:12-14
1 John 5:9-13
"Reality, reality,
Lord Jesus Christ, Thou art to me...
Glorious reality"
--Francis Ridley Havergal
There's a serious lack of permission to fail, being distributed in the conservative homeschooling community.
My observation is that children tend to live up to their parents' desires. If the parents want more than anything for their kids to look good, so the family will look good, so they'll be accepted in the community, then they'll raise children that look good. Except at some point reality takes over and half the children stop looking good. So the parents freak out and try to make the children look good again -- clean up their music, their friendships, their clothing, etc. At which point the child either gives in and becomes a great-looking shell (and the parents wonder what's missing), or rebels and heads out to find something that matches what seems to be real to him/her.
Too often, I fall into the shell category.
We need to remember that our search for reality is not meant to be something we do as isolated individuals; that may be an acceptable form of Americanism, but it is not Christian faith. When Jesus modeled a prayer for us, the first word out of his mouth was, "Our." So we are meant to find God in the community of the church. Edification by great preaching and joyful worship are possible in a crowd of hundreds of people, but only the small discipling group can give us the face-to-face community we need and long for. So we need the small group as an integral part of church life, the place where the community of saints is experienced.
Good thoughts all. Thank you Robert and Mark especially. David, I agree that community is an essential part of Christianity, but I fear a lot of young people may be coasting along with the crowd without realizing that it also requires individual commitment.
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